Bob Collins
Who knows whether Minnesota will ever again be the official home of winter in the United States?
On Tuesday, an inch or two of snow triggered nearly 300 crashes across the state. That suggests we’re closer to our southern kin than we’d care to admit.
For this year, anyway, Massachusetts is the king of the hill and here’s the scary part for people who value Minnesota’s image: They’re being positively Minnesotan about it.
Boston, for example, is only 1.9 inches away from breaking the 107.6-inch record set in 1995-96, and more snow could come tonight.
That’s not the thing. This is the thing: A lot of people are rooting for more snow, just so they can break the record, the Boston Globe reports today.
But in Abington, Michelle Mayberger, who owns Happy Dogs Pet Resort, cannot wait for more snow. Her motives extend beyond the record. She has seen a rise in her day-care business, owing to the mountainous drifts that are preventing owners from letting their pups run around their yards. With a plow and snow blower, she has been able to clear good paths for her four-legged friends.
“I’m glad,” she added wryly, “that someone’s enjoying the snow.”
But even those hungry for a record are not entirely united. They fall into two camps: those who want just enough snow to claim the top spot and a decidedly smaller group of those who want to crush it.
“I want to break the record big because it would make history,” said Rufus Huff, who works for Keolis Commuter Services in Wakefield, which operates the MBTA’s still-hobbled commuter rail. “Maybe 10 inches or more, so it will stand for a long time, and maybe never even be broken again.”
That’s either a person who moved from northern Minnesota, or a person who one day will move there.
For those of us who have relatives in the northeast, talking about a disdain of winter is off limits for Midwesterners. We’ve got no standing in the discussion. For this year, anyway, we sound like people from Arizona who complain that it got so cold last night, we had to put on a pair of long pants.
And so we will tuck away the advice of psychiatrist Ned Hallowell for a time if or when an unbearable winter returns to its former home.
“Complaining is the best thing to do,” he tells the Globe. “It’s good for the soul. Don’t suck it up. Don’t look on the bright side. There is no bright side.”
How not to do winter: Snow Wars: Cleveland-Area Neighbors Battle Over Sidewalk Shoveling Dispute (WKYC).
