How not to make a good impression on a date

Long-time readers of News Cut know that catching a foul ball at a baseball game has been on my ” bucket list” for decades. But it apparently wasn’t on this guy’s. He ducked out of the way and let his “girlfriend” take the hit at a game in Houston recently, earning him an honored place as an Internet viral video.


I’ve often fantasized about how I’d catch a foul ball; it’d either be with a cup full of beer or the innovative use of my hat. Then, as the crowd cheered, I would look around for a little kid, and give him/her the ball. The crowd would cheer wildly some more. I’d be on the JumboTron, someone would start a Twitter account “GreatGuyAtTargetField” which would blow the kestrel and the squirrel’s Twitter accounts of the water, and Jason Derusha’s Good Question the next night would be, “why can’t he world be more like Bob?” He’d have so many people willing to talk, but he’d settle on the little kid, so that everyone else would have their hands free to wipe away their tears at the beauty of it all.

I had my chance in spring training. We were sitting in the second row by the dugout when a line drive came screaming in my direction. But it just barely hit the padding and did not come into the stands, although I did not see where it went. I had ducked behind my wife.

Where was I?

Right. This couple. They’ve broken up.